We saw the movie, The Help, last Sunday. I laughed, I cried, and I cheered. It’s a great story to explain the “separate but equal” period of our history…a period that is shameful. But, I left the movie cheering the courage of those who paved the way for greater equality.
Children need to understand “separate but equal”
As I thought about the movie and the lessons it teaches, I knew I wanted my older grandchildren to see it. They have grown up in a culture in which the tragedy of “separate but equal” has been forgotten. Several months ago, I mentioned to a grandson that when I was a child, there were separate drinking fountains for “colored.” He was appalled. I thank God that we have reached a place in our nation when our response to this part of our history is shock.
Our children need to know how America acted during that time. Only as we learn about our past can we avoid repeating it in new circumstances.
How to handle the bad language in the movie
The movie has some bad language, but by middle school, our children have heard it all. I suggest approaching the questionable language as you would the words they hear on the school yard. You might have a conversation something like the following:
“We would like for our family to see the move, The Help, although it has some questionable content. I want to prepare you for what you will see and hear.
“You often hear people using bad words. They’re not just in this movie. Our responsibility in following God’s Word in such situations is twofold:
- “We must not use unacceptable language just because we hear it from others. Our words should always bring glory to God: ‘May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.’ Psalm 19:14
- “When we hear someone using bad words, we must not judge them. Remember, we are not the ones to judge people for what they do. “You, then, why do you judge your brother? Or why do you look down on your brother? For we will all stand before God’s judgment seat.’ Romans 14:10.
“Also, there are some other things in the movie like smoking, getting drunk, and using violence that you know are wrong. However, I want you to look at the lessons we can learn from the history of that time.”
You know your children better than I do, so you should be the one who decides at what age this movie is appropriate. Go to http://www.pluggedin.com/movies/intheaters/help.aspx‘ for a comprehensive review.
August 26, 2011 at 2:17 pm
Thank you! I would not have thought of showing my kids this movie assuming it would bore them. (I haven’t seen it myself yet.) You are right–they desperately need to know about this dark part of our country’s history. Movies and books paint vivid pictures that stick in their minds better than mom’s lectures. I’ll check out the link you provided to Plugged In Movie Reviews.
August 28, 2011 at 12:57 pm
My 25 year old daughter and I saw it yesterday. I’m glad she saw it since I was active in the civil rights movement as a teen,and had told her some of the struggles we faced. Two ladies sitting next to her commented to her after the show that they were appalled at how Christians could treat others like that. She wanted to reply that they were probably doing the same to gays or other such groups today, but did not out of politeness. I hope this movie can give people insights into the past, but also to our present prejudices.
August 30, 2011 at 9:11 pm
Isn’t it funny how we look back on our bad behavior as a culture and think it was awful, but don’t recognize that we are treating someone badly today? I think some of that comes from following the crowd. One of the things we need to teach our children is to love others even if the crowd isn’t going that way.
August 31, 2011 at 9:09 am
I have not seen the movie but do plan to see it soon. Culture(s) are truly amazing. I find it appalling that society blames so many behaviors, both good and bad, on culture. I totally agree with your reply.
August 31, 2011 at 2:41 pm
What will they say about our behavior fifty years from now?
October 1, 2011 at 4:16 am
I was looking eveyrewrhe and this popped up like nothing!
October 29, 2011 at 2:34 pm
Have you seen The Help?
August 31, 2011 at 10:17 pm
I read the book and plan to see the movie with my sister and 13 year old neice. It will be interesting to see what my neices response is to the movie.
September 3, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Lori, I would love to know what your niece thinks about the movie. I think that our children have no idea how badly we treated Blacks in those days. It was almost as if they had never been freed from slavery. And, even so, that kind of treatment should not happen to any of God’s children, slave or free.